Last week, by request I released another “Dressing with your corset” video in which I showed how to hide your corset under clothes such as bubble shirts and tunic sweaters. I had done a similar video in the past, in which I showed how empire waisted shirts work well in concealing corsets. Both times, in the days following these videos, I got a confused backlash in the community about the reasons that one would want to hide their corsets. After all, don’t people wear corsets for the purpose of showing off their tiny waists?
Not everyone. Otherwise I wouldn’t have gotten so many requests to do these videos in the first place.
One viewer made a very good point that in an office setting where open-toed shoes are frowned upon and denim skirts (even ankle length) have the employee sent home, corsets would definitely not be appropriate attire. If you would like to wear your corset at your desk, you will have to hide it under your shirt.
But even more than that, some people still consider the corset to be strictly an undergarment, and would feel weird about showing it off. Even today, I constantly get comments on my videos from people saying, “Aren’t you supposed to wear that thing underneath your shirt instead of overtop?”
I find this question irritating only because it’s so common. But if some people believe that the corset is designed to be worn under clothing, they shouldn’t be berated for it.
Some wear corsets to relieve back pain, or to help with their posture. Some use the corset to boost their confidence and control their appetite. Some wear corsets because they enjoy the deep pressure, but the figure-altering aspect is secondary. This is why I made a point of making those videos first, before resuming my “dressing with corsets” videos; to help people understand that there are corseters who wear them for reasons apart from the visual aspect; who are not ashamed by their practice, but they simply don’t want / feel the need to broadcast their corset. Despite a common interest in corseting, different people still have different tastes in dress.
What’s my excuse?
One fan on Facebook asked me why I specifically would want to hide my corset, when I’m a public figure in corseting, and it’s so well known among my friends and family?
I do like to wear my corsets out in evenings and at special events, but when I’m working (I do have a job outside of corsetry), I don’t consider corsets to be appropriate work attire. Also, although it’s well known in my personal circle that I wear corsets, the corset community is pretty much nil in the little town where I live. When I’m running errands and need to get a lot done, I simply don’t have the time to be stopped and asked about my corseting – for this same reason, although I have long hair and I show it off when I want to, there are also days that I can’t be bothered to be gawked at or confronted so I put it up in a bun.
I guess it all comes down to the fact that although my personal tastes are alternative, and although I’m not ashamed of the way I dress or look, I don’t consider it anyone else’s business. I wear corsets (and also keep my hair long) for my happiness, but don’t necessarily need others’ attention in order to feel validated.
I’m sure that many people can relate to this in a different vein – it’s kind of like having a tattoo or body piercing that nobody knows about but you, or even wearing matching underwear on a good day; this little secret can make you happy and put a bounce in your step without the need to show it off at all times. As long as it makes you happy, that’s all that matters.
But if I don’t need validation, why do I show off corsets all the time in my videos?
My Youtube/ Facebook/ website feel sort of like my ‘domain’ where I feel okay about making my corsets visible. As my public pages and channel are clearly a place where people seek out more information about corsetry, it would be confusing if I didn’t show off my corsets in that respect, actually. It’s not only so that I can promote the fantastic creations of various corsetieres and show the incredible diversity in cut, silhouette, fabric, color etc. But imagine how weird it would be to have a cooking channel, but there’s no food in sight. Imagine a documentary about mountain lions, but there were no mountain lions shown. If I didn’t show corsets in a corset-related channel, it might be considered just as unusual.
Bottom line.
I don’t know how to put this any other way, and the fact that people from within the corset community are pointing fingers for something as petty as wearing your corset over or under your shirt is a bit ridiculous. If you want to show off your corsets, show them off. You’ve worked hard for your waist. But if you want to hide your corset under clothing, go ahead and hide it. I don’t consider you vainglorious or an exhibitionist to make your corseting public, and I don’t consider you ashamed or apologetic to keep it secret. And neither should anyone else. What you do with your body (and how you portray it) is your business alone.
Everything you say makes so much Sense!!!
I guess that whenever I’m starting wearing corsets,I will be too shy to show it at first.
I’m learning so much from you and I’m forever very Grateful!
Milly!
Unfortunately, I usually have quick retorts to comments I find annoying. While eating dinner at a restaurant, I had a friend telling me how horrible corseting PROBABLY is for me. I asked her if she had done any research on the matter and she said No. Then I asked her ” How are those 2 margaritas, cheeseburger and fries good for you?” She never made a comment about my corsets again, other than how cute they were and how she wanted me to make her one. :-)
Go Vanessa! : )
Funny Vanessa how “had a friend telling me how horrible corseting PROBABLY is”. and more importatntly how she had never esearched anything and probably never wore one. I wonder how many of those who call us “tightwaisters” etc have ever worn one.
Thank you so much for this Lucy! There needs to be more articles like this informing those that want to know, and perhaps it will help others that don’t understand to learn a little more themselves. Like my husband…although he thinks even having it under my clothes at work was inappropriate. Guess I should toss my bra and underwear out too, since it is hardly any different!
I needed a corset to make my Victorian clothes fit properly. NO proper Victorian lady allowed her corset or her hoop skirt to be seen. I have had a very difficult time finding a corset which was big enough (I weigh 230 pounds and have a 45″ waist) and which will not show under a white blouse or light colored dress.
I love your point about not showing your corset because you do not always have time to provide an explanation to the curious! Although it is surprising to me, strangers ARE actually rude enough to approach in a public place and ask wildly inappropriate questions. Yesterday, while wearing my concealed corset at the grocery store, a complete stranger asked me my waist size. Perhaps if people were more generally polite it would not be as neccessary to hide.
I know that when I wear a corset in public (as in, not while in costume), the fact that it is such a dramatically different shape than what is considered the norm makes me want to draw as little attention to my body as I can. It is weirdly self-conscious, but the female body is so heavily judged on its proportions that I think it’s totally ok to want to minimize any thing that falls out of that norm. Especially when we’re talking about creating a silhouette that is fetishized (in both the academic, and pop-cultural senses).
Nicely put! I was so excited to start corseting I never thought I’d feel uncomfortable wearing my corset outside my clothes, but when it comes down to it most of the time it isn’t appropriate in my life. However, when the situation is right I will proudly show off my waist. I love your videos that give clothing options either way! On another subject I’d love tips on how to tell if a dry cleaner really knows how to treat a corset. I live in a fairly small town and am nervous about that!
Some people don’t have enuf things to worry about
Well stated Lucy!!!
I also am in a small town and showing my corset is not appropriate work attire. But my posture and confidence levels have changed dramatically since I started in Nov. Thank you so much for everything you do! : )
Awesome Article! These are exactly my thoughts!!!